• Restarting your sex life


    We all get turned on by seeing or hearing our partner surrender to pleasure. As a mother with a partner myself, I know how easy it is to overlook this step—and how fast complacency with the mundane can set in. Make telling him what you like part of your sex talk. There are also flavored lubes that he might enjoy. Fantasizing about other potential partners or repressing out sex drives are ways we may try to dilute the power desire has over us and reduce the accompanying risk. Taking a bath together beforehand is one idea.

    Restarting your sex life

    The chase is almost better than the catch. At least for a while, push aside its emotional significance. No obligation to do it again. But this isn't really possible.. Your partner is simply exerting control over his or her own life at this point and time, and has every right to do so. What other ways besides all-consuming carnal passion can you indulge in together? Treat it with care and respect, as you both treat each other. For instance, a male emotional distancer absorbed in his career may want connection in bed. While not your intention, this conversation can convey to your partner that it wasn't "good enough. And, from the perspective of the individual, it may be useful advice. This is the opposite of what is actually going on. Become an expert seducer. The lovely connection you feel after making love will bond you all night. Text in the morning about your naughty plans. Throw in a culture that esteems independence and, for some of us, childhoods where we concluded that our needs were bad because they overwhelmed our parents, and sexual desire begins to feel like weakness. Acceptance that there were misgivings about that first sexual experience, and a discussion with a therapist, most likely about those misgivings fears? Refusing sex serves, in these cases, the dual purpose of protecting oneself from domination and exerting control over — or fighting back against - that dominating partner. Email your questions to: There are couples who accept the passing of passion as a milestone. And, yes, I know that this also impacts your own life and well-being…which, for better and worse, is part of being in a couple instead of being single. If you feel starved sexually, your partner probably feels starved in some other way. Choose a time that you are both relaxed and able to talk without interruption. The candlelight dinner may just leave you sleepy with heartburn. While their roles change, the distance between them stays constant. Make telling him what you like part of your sex talk. There's also the longing for another that cuts the "six-inch valley in the middle of our skulls" Springsteen.

    Restarting your sex life

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    How do I restart our sex life after cheating, betrayal or infidelity?

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